Thursday, July 31, 2008

What’s The “Win” for a Small Group Leader?

There are many things small group leaders can try to do well, but we need to know what the ultimate “win,” or "mark of success," is so we can continue to strive toward that.

For small group leaders, the “win” is changed lives. Small group leaders are the people who get to be on the front lines of ministry, helping kids understand how Biblical principles relate to their lives, helping them internalize Scripture, and teaching them spiritual disciplines like how to pray.

You know you are making headway in your ministry when…
  • kids become more comfortable praying aloud and do it more frequently
  • kids tell you about prayers they pray when they aren’t in church

  • kids memorize verses and understand how to apply them to their lives
  • kids make practical applications of the Biblical principles you are discussing
  • kids tell you how they applied the previous week’s lesson or how they have made a wise choice during the week

  • kids begin to treat others with more respect

  • kids demonstrate an increased level of faith in Christ as they discuss difficult situations they (or others in your group) face. When their response to these situations is to pray, they are demonstrating faith.

Some ways to promote life change (apart from prayer)
  • Tell kids how God is answering your prayers so they can see that God really does hear and respond to us.
  • Ask kids how God is answering their prayers. Be sure to have kids thank God for His answers.
  • Encourage kids to pray when they face difficult situations.

  • As kids learn the monthly verse, make sure they understand what it means and how it applies to their lives. Learning Bible verses isn’t enough. The need to understand how God's Word can change their lives.
  • Make sure each kid leaves small group with one concrete way to apply the lesson.
  • Use prayer time to have each child ask for God’s help to apply the lesson.
  • Ask kids from week to week how they applied last week’s lesson.
  • Share your experiences of applying Scripture to your life.

  • Encourage kids to treat others with respect (listen when others are talking, use kind words, offer to help others, etc.)

Each week keep an eye out for any evidence that God is at work in the lives of your kids and celebrate that!

Have a great small group this week!

Thursday, July 17, 2008

God Is Working

Last Sunday I had the privilege of leading the first grade small group in DU. It wasn’t actually a small group; the kids filled two round tables (a topic for a future post.)

It had been more than a decade since I’d led a group of kids that age and I truly enjoyed being with them.

When it came time for kids to talk about how they could apply the virtue, I stayed at one of the tables so I could have a more in-depth conversation with the kids. The analogy of self-control being like the walls of a city was a bit challenging for them, but the kids began to grasp the idea that when they use kind words, their lives will go better and when they use mean words, they’ll bring problems on themselves. We talked about how showing gratitude is one way to use kind words.

We ended up with extra time, so I encouraged the kids to draw a picture of someone they could thank this week as a way to show self control with their words.

As the parents started picking up their children, one little girl came over to me and showed me her picture. This was a girl who had been disagreeable at the beginning of group time. As she held up her picture, she had a big smile on her face.
“That’s a great picture! Who’s it of?” I asked her.

“Jesus,” she replied.

“What are you going to thank Jesus for?”

“For letting me live.”
Then, she bowed her head in the middle of the room as parents were picking up their kids and prayed. “Thank you, Jesus, for letting me live.”

Wow! What a great morning! This little girl, who seemed contrary at first, was really listening and learning to appreciate Jesus. That’s what we’re after – helping kids (even those who don’t seem very engaged) understand that Jesus loves them and cares for them.

Rest assured that as you love kids and respond to them positively, even when they seem disengaged or contrary, God is working in their hearts, drawing them to Himself.

Monday, July 7, 2008

Be Careful At the Curves

Once or twice a year, I get the privilege of preaching in our church. Since I don’t get to do that very often, I don’t get many opportunities to refine my public speaking. A couple years ago, I decided I’d better read some books to figure out how to deliver a message that is memorable.

I came across a book titled Communicating For a Change by Andy Stanley and loved it. One of the points he makes in this book is be careful at the curves.

What he means is this:

When you are making a transition, make sure you are taking your listeners with you through that transition. Don’t lose them.

Public speakers have a tendency to lose their audience by moving too quickly through transitions, so Stanley's advice to them is “slow down at the curves.”

As I’ve observed children’s small group leaders, what I’ve realized is that they often lose their kids during transition times because they slow down too much. If a leader is unprepared, she often stops after one activity to read the next one and then figure out what to say to the kids. While she’s quietly reading the plans, the kids’ get fidgety. They might begin to talk with each other, poke each other, giggle, and throw things . If the leader is really slow about engaging kids in the next activity, mayhem can break out.

As a small group leader, one of the most effective ways for you to prepare for your time with kids is to pre-script your transitions. Write them out word for word. Be very clear (yet concise) about what you want kids to do and why. Don’t say too little. Don’t ramble on and on.

You might think this is too time consuming, but I assure you, it works. If you know exactly what you want your kids to do next and you can verbally move them from one activity to the next without pausing to think about what to say, you’ll hold kids’ attention and they’ll stick with you.

Pause now and think about your small group. Do you tend to lose kids at the curves? Do they start talking to each other between activities? Do you struggle to get their attention whenever it’s time to shift gears in your group?

If this describes your group, I encourage you to take the extra 10 minutes to script out your transitions. In one week, you’ll notice a difference. Your ten minute sacrifice will result in more focused class time, which will result in more time for kids to learn how to apply God’s truths, to pray, to learn Bible verses and to make meaningful friendships. Your weekly ten minute sacrifices will make an eternal difference in the lives of your kids.

Come back next week to get ideas about the order of directions…